A Modern Day Doubting Thomas - Mental War
John 20:25
So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”
It was Spring of 2008 not long after my father passed away of Cancer. This was the year of the biggest economic collapse since the Great Depression. That year was difficult for several reasons losing my Dad to a terminal illness and making a huge move. With all that was going on in our lives the day was just beautiful. I decided to take my dog for a walk. I sat down on a bench just to take in the day. This gentleman came along and sat down beside me and asked me what kind of dog I had. Making small talk, I thought OK dude I am married! It was not long though into the conversation that I knew he was just wanting to chit-chat. He was our neighbor and he was staying with his mom.
As we talked about the weather, where we were from, and just about life in general. He said he was so sorry to hear about my dad. He looked at me and said do you think God would consider if he committed suicide that it would be a mercy killing? I looked at him and said no, no way, God would never consider that a mercy killing you are taking the life out of God’s hands. When my Dad took his last breath that was God’s timetable when God wanted him to die not when man wanted him to. So no to God it is still murder. He did not say anything one way or the other. We parted ways and I never saw him again. A few years later I ran into his mom. I asked her how her son was doing. She said Thomas had passed away from a terminal illness 6 months prior. I had no idea he was sick and I told her I was so sorry, I had only met him once and he was a very nice man.
Over the past week, I have been struggling with people. Just people in general of how they lie, how they convince themselves that they are so within the will of God. In all reality, they have become so obsessed with learning the truth on their own they are living a lie. As I watched the documentary of David Koresh it showed me these people are becoming nothing more than a mere cult leader like him. They have convinced themselves they are so right, and they have been blessed with sight and others around us are just as blind as bats. David Koresh told the people that the Govt was coming they were coming to strip them of their rights. Boots to the ground Marshall law, Fema camps on and on. Instilled fear, and used it to his advantage. Conspiracy theories saturated his words and the thoughts he conveyed to others it was so profound. And when the Govt did come the people that were following him were at this point so brainwashed they believed he was the Messiah. He broke the law period you break the law you bet the govt is coming after you. But the people did not see it that way they only saw what he had preached was coming true.
It did not end there what else stemmed out of Koresh? Timothy McVeigh came out of Waco as well which led to even more deaths. All the while people want to sit and yammer about oh it is ALL the govt. No, it is EVIL there is evil within citizens just as much as the United States Govt. People like this want certain things to happen the way they want because they believe it is so much they try to create it. Sadly David Koresh succeeded he brought the United States Govt there because he broke the law. Do you see why the words you use matter? Words can heal or they can destroy.
Do not get me wrong I know the US Govt is corrupt to the core, and I am not defending it in any way. We as believers need to be careful we only need to follow prophecy, what God says, and not get caught up in what the world is spinning.
I have been dealing with a lot of emotional pain that has been implemented on me by other people for years now. A lot of it is because I care too much about others. I do not get out there and toot my own horn and want people to look at me. Look everybody I am a Christian and God is using me to shed some light in the darkness. I do not go to social media and spout what I believe the US Govt is doing in every single post. I do not take conspiracy theories and preach them like they are the gospel when in all reality it is rumors spread through social media like it is a virus. If we preach on prophetic messages from the Bible that is one thing but to run wild with what man has said is dangerous. They are doing the same thing the Govt is doing, propaganda it is a mental war over your mind. Like my husband says conspiracy theorists all they have to do is plant doubt and then they have you right where they want you. You have to remember that what we think and what is the truth is sometimes miles apart. Satan loves this and he counts on people like this to spread even more seeds of doubt.
We have to be careful with our words we can influence people even when we do not realize it. We can not be careless.
I have not thought about Thomas in well over 7 to 8 years. He honestly has never even remotely crossed my mind. I have been praying and thinking about many other things in my life. Not stressing but at a point where something has to give. I guess you can say patience I have been shown by God that patience is the key to everything. It is not in knowing it all!
Last night when I was in the shower I was thinking about all of this. I told God I did not want to be this person anymore and I meant it. It is the person who is always on the back burner, the person who always gets the short end of the stick. Because when I love I give all that I have. You do not get not a one-second chance with me, you get 101! I told God that is it I am done no more. Then out of nowhere in my mind, the encounter with Thomas overflowed my memories like a dam had been broken. That day came flooding into my head and that moment when I had an encounter with a modern-day doubting Thomas. I told my husband that I did not even think about it at the time when his mother told me he died of a terminal illness. It was not until last night so many years later that I once again saw him in my mind asking that one question and me answering him. I realized how much my words mattered and not what I THOUGHT but what GOD THINKS. This man was dying, and I had no clue, was he thinking about killing himself and reaching out to a stranger for help? Was this all a coincidence? I mean right down to his name? Here I was doubting who I was and how I needed to change because I am tired of being treated poorly by others. God reminded me that if I was not who I was at that “GOD MOMENT” Thomas might not be with him. Do I know this for a fact no, but I know God. There are no coincidences.
God reminded me last night who I am and who I need to be for him, I did not need to change. He reminded me that He and I have a lot of work to do I may not know every day the lives that he changes. And that is OK! Most of the time being a follower of Yeshua does not mean you are front in line here on this earth. We will always have the back burner and ya know what that is OK too! Because of my revelation, I will take that back burner every day of the week and Saturday and Sunday twice over if that means one more soul will be with our Father. There is a doubting Thomas in all of us. There is the Biblical Thomas and there is for me a modern-day Thomas. I was not doubting God I was doubting myself. God showed me that we both needed each other that day. It was a day where words truly mattered. But that day from here on out for me will never be forgotten again. When I doubt I will remember that conversation with that stranger on a park bench I will remember the modern-day Thomas that crossed my path.
Amen.
Shannon Wendler
John 20:25
So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”
It was Spring of 2008 not long after my father passed away of Cancer. This was the year of the biggest economic collapse since the Great Depression. That year was difficult for several reasons losing my Dad to a terminal illness and making a huge move. With all that was going on in our lives the day was just beautiful. I decided to take my dog for a walk. I sat down on a bench just to take in the day. This gentleman came along and sat down beside me and asked me what kind of dog I had. Making small talk, I thought OK dude I am married! It was not long though into the conversation that I knew he was just wanting to chit-chat. He was our neighbor and he was staying with his mom.
As we talked about the weather, where we were from, and just about life in general. He said he was so sorry to hear about my dad. He looked at me and said do you think God would consider if he committed suicide that it would be a mercy killing? I looked at him and said no, no way, God would never consider that a mercy killing you are taking the life out of God’s hands. When my Dad took his last breath that was God’s timetable when God wanted him to die not when man wanted him to. So no to God it is still murder. He did not say anything one way or the other. We parted ways and I never saw him again. A few years later I ran into his mom. I asked her how her son was doing. She said Thomas had passed away from a terminal illness 6 months prior. I had no idea he was sick and I told her I was so sorry, I had only met him once and he was a very nice man.
Over the past week, I have been struggling with people. Just people in general of how they lie, how they convince themselves that they are so within the will of God. In all reality, they have become so obsessed with learning the truth on their own they are living a lie. As I watched the documentary of David Koresh it showed me these people are becoming nothing more than a mere cult leader like him. They have convinced themselves they are so right, and they have been blessed with sight and others around us are just as blind as bats. David Koresh told the people that the Govt was coming they were coming to strip them of their rights. Boots to the ground Marshall law, Fema camps on and on. Instilled fear, and used it to his advantage. Conspiracy theories saturated his words and the thoughts he conveyed to others it was so profound. And when the Govt did come the people that were following him were at this point so brainwashed they believed he was the Messiah. He broke the law period you break the law you bet the govt is coming after you. But the people did not see it that way they only saw what he had preached was coming true.
It did not end there what else stemmed out of Koresh? Timothy McVeigh came out of Waco as well which led to even more deaths. All the while people want to sit and yammer about oh it is ALL the govt. No, it is EVIL there is evil within citizens just as much as the United States Govt. People like this want certain things to happen the way they want because they believe it is so much they try to create it. Sadly David Koresh succeeded he brought the United States Govt there because he broke the law. Do you see why the words you use matter? Words can heal or they can destroy.
Do not get me wrong I know the US Govt is corrupt to the core, and I am not defending it in any way. We as believers need to be careful we only need to follow prophecy, what God says, and not get caught up in what the world is spinning.
I have been dealing with a lot of emotional pain that has been implemented on me by other people for years now. A lot of it is because I care too much about others. I do not get out there and toot my own horn and want people to look at me. Look everybody I am a Christian and God is using me to shed some light in the darkness. I do not go to social media and spout what I believe the US Govt is doing in every single post. I do not take conspiracy theories and preach them like they are the gospel when in all reality it is rumors spread through social media like it is a virus. If we preach on prophetic messages from the Bible that is one thing but to run wild with what man has said is dangerous. They are doing the same thing the Govt is doing, propaganda it is a mental war over your mind. Like my husband says conspiracy theorists all they have to do is plant doubt and then they have you right where they want you. You have to remember that what we think and what is the truth is sometimes miles apart. Satan loves this and he counts on people like this to spread even more seeds of doubt.
We have to be careful with our words we can influence people even when we do not realize it. We can not be careless.
I have not thought about Thomas in well over 7 to 8 years. He honestly has never even remotely crossed my mind. I have been praying and thinking about many other things in my life. Not stressing but at a point where something has to give. I guess you can say patience I have been shown by God that patience is the key to everything. It is not in knowing it all!
Last night when I was in the shower I was thinking about all of this. I told God I did not want to be this person anymore and I meant it. It is the person who is always on the back burner, the person who always gets the short end of the stick. Because when I love I give all that I have. You do not get not a one-second chance with me, you get 101! I told God that is it I am done no more. Then out of nowhere in my mind, the encounter with Thomas overflowed my memories like a dam had been broken. That day came flooding into my head and that moment when I had an encounter with a modern-day doubting Thomas. I told my husband that I did not even think about it at the time when his mother told me he died of a terminal illness. It was not until last night so many years later that I once again saw him in my mind asking that one question and me answering him. I realized how much my words mattered and not what I THOUGHT but what GOD THINKS. This man was dying, and I had no clue, was he thinking about killing himself and reaching out to a stranger for help? Was this all a coincidence? I mean right down to his name? Here I was doubting who I was and how I needed to change because I am tired of being treated poorly by others. God reminded me that if I was not who I was at that “GOD MOMENT” Thomas might not be with him. Do I know this for a fact no, but I know God. There are no coincidences.
God reminded me last night who I am and who I need to be for him, I did not need to change. He reminded me that He and I have a lot of work to do I may not know every day the lives that he changes. And that is OK! Most of the time being a follower of Yeshua does not mean you are front in line here on this earth. We will always have the back burner and ya know what that is OK too! Because of my revelation, I will take that back burner every day of the week and Saturday and Sunday twice over if that means one more soul will be with our Father. There is a doubting Thomas in all of us. There is the Biblical Thomas and there is for me a modern-day Thomas. I was not doubting God I was doubting myself. God showed me that we both needed each other that day. It was a day where words truly mattered. But that day from here on out for me will never be forgotten again. When I doubt I will remember that conversation with that stranger on a park bench I will remember the modern-day Thomas that crossed my path.
Amen.
Shannon Wendler